How to Build a The Successful Mindset

The 3 Questions

It's incredible how something so small can lead to massive, lasting changes. Things as simple as drinking more water each day, or only buying food that will wilt and go bad in a few days are just two examples of how to eat healthier.

Adding a day or two of sprints or even taking a day or two each week to NOT workout are some examples of simple concepts that will make you're training better.

What about your mindset though?

You're mindset is the often overlooked aspect of living a healthier and livelier life. It's not as sexy as saying "do crossfit 12 times per week!" or as controversial as "eating whole eggs will cause your unborn babies to develop AIDs!". But your mindset, the way you perceive things, is the leader or your actions. Wherever your mind goes, your body will follow.

So how do we fix this? Where do we focus our attention to quickly and efficiently change our mindset for the better?

Ask questions.

Just like a toddler who is learning about the world, you should be questioning damn near everything you hear. At the very least you need to be asking the following questions during almost every interaction or after every thought you have.

Says who? What's that? Why?

How long ago was it "common sense" that eggs were bad for you? How long after that did it turn out the it was "just the yolks" that were bad? Now what about red meat...bad or good? It depends on what time period you're thinking about.

Take it back even farther...it's "common sense" that humans physically can not run a mile in under 4 minutes. It's also proven science that if a woman plays sports her uterus will fall out of her body.

What's changed since then? Someone asked the question.

"Steve...you can't run a mile in under 4 minutes! If you get close you'll die!"

"Ladies go bake a pie because if you try to dribble a basketball your precious little uterus will fall out and get blood all over the hardwood floor!"

Both of these are just matters of perception. They were perceived to be facts until someone decided that they had enough and asked the questions. Perceptions screw with people when they willfully ignore the full story or refuse to put the facts together.

Here's an example...a cat. Is it a cute and cuddly pet or is it a cold blooded killer?

Well it depends on your perception of, or how you perceive, the cat. Are you the person who the cat decides to cuddle up next to or are you the mouse who was chased and then killed by the cat?

What about Santa Claus? When you were a kid it made complete sense that a fat man would slide down your chimney (regardless of if you even HAD a chimney or not) and leave you presents. When you get older you get more facts and the way you perceive the idea of this fat man conducting a breaking and entering on every house in the world in a single night seems a tad unrealistic.

Yeah, right here, now it may seem fucking impossible to deadlift 500 pounds. But who says you can't? Why can't you? When you are able to answer these questions and realize that the answer is "because I'm a pussy that's afraid to work" it becomes easier to hit that goal because you want to prove yourself wrong.

Right now it seems that there is no way that you'll ever be able to figure out the right way to eat that will let you stay lean and still have a social life. Again, after you ask yourself why, who says that and why they say that, you'll see that you're well within reach of doing that.

As soon as you realize that you can take control of the food you put in your mouth, your perception changes.

As soon as you realize that you can work towards any goal that you choose and that you're in control of what direction you choose, you will find the journey to fantastically enjoyable and you'll actually see it through.

4 Real Steps to Be More Confident

The most recognized quality of an Alpha Male/Female is confidence. It doesn't matter how awesome you are in every other aspect of life, if you're not confident then you're not Alpha. That's it. Want proof? Go to a dance club and look at every douche in there. Most of the people who you'll see will be supremely confident in themselves, but may not necessarily be an Alpha.

Now, these tips won't make you an Alpha. I can guarantee that just by doing them that you will be feel, and most importantly, be more confident.

Talk Louder

Not screaming, just louder. When you're walking down the street and someone randomly says "hi" how do you respond? With a quick and quite "hey..." that they can barely hear/understand or with a "Hey. How are you?" that could easily be heard and understood a few feet away.

It's the same concept when you're having regular conversation with someone. When you make it so the other person has to lean in, strain to hear you, and ask you to repeat yourself over and over it makes it look like you aren't confident in what you're saying.

When you look like you're not confident in what you're saying, you look less confident overall. When this happens people will automatically discount your opinions.

If you're wrong then so be it. But don't let your opinion get brushed to the side because you're afraid to speak up.

Put Your Shoulder Blades in Your Back Pockets

Time to get physical. Stand up, pinch your shoulder blades together, and then push them down like you're trying to put them in your back pockets.

What just happened?

You're standing up straighter than you usual do and your chest isn't caved in anymore. This is the look of someone who is confident and strong.

Hell...it'll even make you look a few inches taller. Guys, don't lie, you know you're always looking to gain an inch or two.

The best part about this one isn't that you look more confident, but that you actually FEEL more confident. Physical actions can trigger emotional responses just like emotional responses will trigger physical actions.

Go look in a mirror and alternate between smiling and frowning. If you pay attention to your feelings, you can actually feel yourself become a bit happier when you smile and sadder when you frown.

Chin Parallel to the Ground

Why do Soldiers and Marines look supremely confident when they're in their dress uniforms?

Because most people are conditioned to see those uniforms and think "whoa...that dude's bad ass". Wearing a military dress uniform isn't something everyone can do.

Raising your chin and keeping it parallel to the ground is something that you CAN do though. This goes hand in hand with the point before this, and creates a physical presence that says "I'm confident, I know it, I got this."

Or for some it screams "I'm sexy and I know it." Really it all just depends on your style...

Move and Talk Slower

Moving and talking slower are things that are so simple and unassuming that most don't even think that they would help them out.

When you get into a conversation and start rattling off sentence after sentence at a pace so fast that people have to work to listen to you. Add in that most people are lazy and they won't do the work to listen to you babble.

Speaking slower projects a calm confidence that people will cause people to somewhat enjoy listening to you. Just think of Morgan Freeman narrating anything...

Moving slower has the same effect. Unless you're playing a sport, moving fast gives the impression that you're either a) in a rush to get somewhere or b) that you're nervous.

Both of these will essentially tell whoever you're talking to that you'd rather be someplace else. No bueno...

Man in Suit

Lamest Workout Ever

This workout is NOT sexy... This workout is NOT new... This workout is NOT fun... This workout would make a horrible YouTube video... If you're intrigued, click-through to find out more about one the most effective builders of strength, stamina, and character.

Congratulations... you're not one of those people who is doing a certain exercise because it looks cool or sexy. That, or you see the errors in your thinking and are looking to turn the corner.

You spend a good amount of your time working on your strength and building your speed. If you're on the right track already, you're doing all of this with movements that work the entire body at the same time.

Nobody cares if you can leg press 1000 lbs. That's about as impressive as riding a tricycle.

Are you ready for this secret workout that is the lamest you'll ever come across? Good...here it is.

Ruck March

Or backpacking. Or hiking. Or loaded carries. Whatever you want to call it.

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Here is the gist of it...

Step 1) Find something, or somethings, heavy

Step 2) Put heavy things in a bag

Step 3) Put bag filled with heavy things on your back and then walk.

"But if it's that simple it can't be effective!"

Bullshit. Go walk a mile with 20 pounds in your pack. Too easy? Bump the weight up to 30 pounds. Still too easy? Make it for 5 miles.

Just from that simple walk you'll get stronger traps from taking the brunt of the load on your shoulders. You'll strengthen your abs and lower back as you sway with each step, and stabilize yourself so you don't tip over. You're upper and middle back will strengthen as you flex and adjust to keep the pack balanced and centered.

Just from picking up the pack to shoulder it you'll see more strength in your legs, shoulders, abs, traps, and back.

Now walk. Feel your calves, quads, hamstrings, and glutes getting stronger as they carry your body plus the extra weight. You don't even need to run. Walking at a pace where you can talk will be difficult in no time.

Start low and light. Like I said, 20 pounds is more than enough for your first ruck. If you're completely out of shape I'd even say go lower. Each week you'll make improvements, so don't feel like you need to go ruck across town and back with 50 pounds of gear.

Make it your Saturday ritual. Grab some coffee, put the leash on Fido, head out the door and just walk. Hell, make it a couples thing if your girlfriend is into this sort of thing.

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All of those douchebags who say that they are training like a Navy SEAL or a Green Beret, aren't. Grab a heavy pack, go for a walk, build your body. But more importantly build your character, become the most mentally tough version of yourself that you can be.

Don't quit, keep moving.